There is a certain predictability about some of our days, which I like.  Dad goes to church Wednesdays and Sundays.  He likes to go shopping Tuesdays and Fridays –  it’s important to have fresh bananas every few days.  Once a month he goes to the library to change his library books.   The washing is done on Mondays.  Not Tuesdays, nor Wednesdays. He likes routine. As do I.

These days, I have some help from time to time with some of these activities – for example I have found a local Uber driver who does a lot of the driving to and from church, although when he can’t do this, I step in – either doing the driving myself or booking an Uber.  Dad has only given up driving behind the wheel; he still likes to drive from the passenger seat so it can be a little tedious at times.  I also have some help from a wonderful lady from Five Good Friends for a few hours each week.

There are lots of other things I do for Dad to make his life a little easier, such as:

• Cook all his meals
• Collect him for dinner at our house once a week
• Prepare meals ahead of time if I am going to be away (not so often any more!)
• Go to a shop in the next suburb to purchase the special cheese he likes and his molasses in a squeeze bottle
• Change the dressing on his ulcer every two days, including cleaning the wound and moisturising
• Make appointments for him
• Take him to the doctor, dentist and other specialists
• Do his buttons up in winter when his fingers struggle with the cold weather
• Rub cream on his back when his skin gets dry
• Order things he needs on-line
• Take him shopping
• Play cribbage every day (and lose on average 2-1 because he is frustratingly lucky – and clever)
• Look phone numbers and other information up for him on my phone (‘that’s not just a phone is it dear?‘)
• Listen patiently while he discusses Oscar’s eating habits, in specific detail
• Look for Oscar when Dad thinks he has gone missing (he is always asleep somewhere, ignoring us)
• Take Oscar to the vet and to his holiday accommodation when Dad goes away
• Help him cut up Oscar’s chicken breast meat into precise sized pieces and put 25 pieces into individual freezer bags, ready for his evening meals
• Deal with rodents, geckos and birds in the house (thanks Oscar)
• Clean up the occasional Oscar vomit (see above), which is always on the carpet never on the tiles or timber floors (cats are awesome)
• Advocate for him with doctors, government and service providers
• Negotiate with the Insurers when they increase his insurance 30% every year
• Take him clothes shopping (which includes helping him get changed)
• Clean out the refrigerator
• Put the bins out on Sunday nights (my husband and sons help with this too)
• Fix Foxtel (his fingers sometimes accidentally change the AV source)
• Source typewriter ribbon for him
• Replace the correction tape in his typewriter (I need to look this up on Youtube every single time!)
• Organise the mowing man and tradespeople
• Take his ironing  home to be done (not by me!)
• Make him a ginger cake or orange cake so he has an afternoon tea snack with his cup of tea
• Act as digital carrier pigeon for correspondence with his brother in the UK
• Post his letters
• Take him to visit friends on occasion
• Put his hearing aids in when I remember (so I don’t have to repeat myself three times)
• Make lots and lots of phone calls and put together colour coded spread sheets should I get the chance to go away

Most importantly, be ready with a hug when he is feeling down.